Recently,  in a large city in France ,
a poster  featuring a young, thin and tan woman appeared in the window of a  gym.
It said,  ”This summer,
do you want  to be a mermaid or a whale?”

A middle aged woman, whose  physical characteristics did not match those of the woman on the  poster,
responded  publicly to the question
posed by  the gym.

To Whom it May Concern, Whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, sea lions, curious humans.) They have  an active sex life,
get  pregnant and have adorable baby whales. They have a wonderful time  with dolphins stuffing themselves with  shrimp.
They play  and swim in the seas,
seeing  wonderful places like Patagonia ,
the Bering  Sea
and the  coral reefs of Polynesia .
Whales are  wonderful singers
and have  even recorded CDs.
They are incredible  creatures
and  virtually have no predators
other than  humans.
They are  loved, protected and admired
by almost  everyone in the world..

Mermaids don’t exisit.If they did  exist,
they would  be lining up outside the offices
of  Argentinean psychoanalysts
due to  identity crisis. Fish or human?
They don’t  have a sex life
because  they kill men who get close to them, not to mention how could they  have sex?
Just look  at them … where is IT?
Therefore,  they don’t have kids either.
Not to  mention,
who wants  to get close to a girl who smells
like a fish  store?
The choice is perfectly clear to  me:
I want to  be a whale.
P..S. We are in an age
when media  puts into our heads
the idea  that only skinny people are beautiful, but I prefer to enjoy an ice  cream with my kids, a good dinner with a man who makes me shiver, and  a piece of chocolate with my friends.
With time,  we gain weight
because we  accumulate so much information and wisdom in our  heads
that when  there is no more room,
it  distributes out to the rest of our bodies.
So we aren’t  heavy,
we are  enormously cultured,
educated  and happy.
Beginning today,
when I look  at my butt in the mirror I will think, Good grief, look how smart I  am!